Wondering how to successfully join in with your child's play?
For some people playing with your child feels comfortable and natural, but for lots of us, this can feel awkward and as an adult you wonder what your role should be. How often do you join in alongside your child in their play? Do you let them lead you in the play and take a back seat? Perhaps your child is brilliant and content with sustaining their own play, or they have siblings that they play with.
In an earlier blog 'Busy doing nothing' it highlighted the importance of children having space to lead their own play, unstructured and independent from adults. So there is a balance to be had!
The ZestLab team caught up with Shelly, a certified Therapeutic Play Practitioner, (soon to be a qualified Play Therapist) who gave us some really great advice to share with you. She firmly believes that above everything is the relationship between the adult and the child and spending postive time engaged with your child will strengthen this.
Shelly recommends that:
1. If your child is already playing - wait to be invited to join in or ask to join the play.
2. Don't worry if your child does not invite you in as there is a really important role sitting alongside while your child plays, just noticing and reflecting out loud their emotions with their actions. You could use phrases like: ' you seem a little frustrated that the pencil nib is broken again' or 'you like you are really enjoying messy play with that huge smile'. What is happening with these statements is that you are supporting your child becoming emotionally literate as well as offering up opportunity for your child to respond if you are wrong. 'I'm not frustrated, I am sad, it's my favourite pencil'. You are creating a safe environment where your child is learning to identify and freely share their feelings. This also creates an opportunity for you to apologise and indentify that you were wrong.
3. And finally, be curious. As adults we have developed our own view of the world, yet your child is still putting theirs together in their own unique way. You may see your child playing with a car, but don't assume the car is a car. It could be a superhero or grandad! Join in with ' I wonder if you can tell me/show me what is ...... Chidlren are amazing for using objects to represent something. They use what is around them to meet their needs in play.
Give it go, find some time and join in with your child's play. It's a win win all round, your child will feel connected, special and enjoy your presence and you will have the joy of deepening your relationship and understanding of your child.
Thank you to Richelle Nimmo (Shelly) (Theraputic Play Skills (APAC Distinction))
So how what about play and intereaction with your baby? Look out for our next blog exploring this.
The ZestLab Team
